All posts tagged: Emotionally

How Is an Emotionally Abusive Family Created?

How Is an Emotionally Abusive Family Created?

Published by Jenni Sidey

All it takes for an emotionally abusive family to be created is for one parent to emotionally abuse the other, or for one parent to emotionally abuse one of the children. Emotional abuse spreads throughout the family like an infectious disease. The constant criticism, belittling, unreasonable expectations, gaslighting, intimidation, dismissing, competition, and silent treatment get passed on from one family member to the next. For example, if the mother in the family is being emotionally abused by the father, the mother may take the anger she is feeling toward her husband out on her children by yelling at them, being overly critical of them, or by making unreasonable demands. Or, so overwhelmed and weakened by the onslaught of unreasonable expectations, constant criticism and accusations, as well as gaslighting, the abused parent may take refuge in alcohol, drugs, or sleep and abandon their responsibilities and their children in the process, creating another form of abuse—neglect. In an emotionally abusive family, every member of the family is affected—everyone becomes part of an extremely toxic environment. Absolutely no …

How to Identify an Emotionally Abusive Family

How to Identify an Emotionally Abusive Family

Published by Jenni Sidey

Family is supposed to be an environment where children receive the love, guidance, encouragement and support they need in order to mature into healthy adults. Unfortunately, in some families, not only are children deprived of the support and encouragement they need, but they are constantly bombarded with experiences of conflict, criticism, competition and chaos. These are what I call emotionally abusive families. The tension and hostility that exist in such families cause children to feel insecure, frightened, and off-balance. In many households, emotionally abusive behavior ends up saturating the family environment until it seems normal. Behavior such as constant putdowns (often in front of others), unreasonable expectations, dismissing or mocking one another’s opinions, and character assassinations go on constantly. While not every emotionally abusive family looks the same, in this post, I will describe many of the common features. Emotionally abusive families can have the following features: Denial. Parents who are being emotionally mistreated by their partner deny they are being abused. They make up excuses for their partner’s behavior: “He’s going through a rough …

Mentally & Emotionally Sensitive Men Feel Most Loved By People Who Do These Things

Mentally & Emotionally Sensitive Men Feel Most Loved By People Who Do These Things

Published by Jenni Sidey

It has been suggested that I’m an HSP (highly sensitive person), an empath, deeply introverted, and a number of other things (all of which have validity)… The bottom line is that I am incredibly sensitive. I get overstimulated easily during everyday activities. I can read someone’s thoughts and emotions from across the room just by watching their face. I write my articles before sunrise because it’s the darkest and quietest hour of the day. I go to movies alone because I want to react to them at my own pace. I go for walks with earplugs in and sunglasses on to limit stimulation. Maybe some of these types of behaviors sound familiar to you (in terms of your personal experience, or you recognize these traits in your highly sensitive partner). Regardless, if you’re still reading, it means you want to know how you can better love your highly sensitive people. Highly sensitive men feel most loved by people who do these things: 1. They don’t rush them Srdjan Randjelovic | Shutterstock Highly sensitive people tend to have …

I Love My Emotionally Stunted Friendships

I Love My Emotionally Stunted Friendships

Published by Sam Flores

This spring, a few weeks before the fishing season began in earnest, I went over to a buddy’s house with a six-pack and a bucket full of beaten-up lures. We sat at his kitchen table, swapping out rusty hooks as we talked about new spots we wanted to try, gear we’d bought over the winter, and the all-important question: When would the first striped bass arrive near us on their annual northward migration? A few hours in, my friend mentioned something his wife had said before I came over: “You spend so much time with Tyler, but whenever I ask you about his personal life, you don’t know anything about it!” He’d replied, “There’s a lot of fishing to talk about!” We both laughed as he recounted the story. Then we went back to replacing hooks and gabbing about striped bass. There was, in fact, a lot of fishing to talk about. These sorts of friendships between men—ones that lack personal disclosure and frequent displays of emotion—have gotten a bad rap in recent years. Some …

Mark Gatiss: ‘Season two is more intriguing emotionally’

Mark Gatiss: ‘Season two is more intriguing emotionally’

Published by Daniella Wilson

Add Bookish to your watchlist Mark Gatiss has always enjoyed sleuthing in the sun. Yes, the Sherlock co-creator agrees murder mysteries are most often associated with dark winter nights, but also notes that “a lot of the famous ones have big, exotic, foreign settings”. “When I was in Poirot 100 years ago, I absolutely couldn’t believe I was doing Appointment with Death, because we went to Morocco,” the Bookish creator and star tells RT. “I got to wear linen – that’s what it’s all about! So I think it actually goes both ways.” Admittedly, the real reason Gatiss is returning with his own murder mystery during the summer months is more prosaic: “It’s when we’re on.” The U&Alibi crime drama Bookish returns for its second outing in August, and while the new series doesn’t visit sunny climes, it does move away from its bookshop setting in Archangel Lane. “The whole thing has a slightly broader canvas,” Gatiss explains. “In episodes five and six we go to Germany. I also think it’s more intriguing emotionally. Some …

Women Who Are Mentally & Emotionally Alluring Usually Do 5 Things In Everyday Life | Mitzi Bockmann

Women Who Are Mentally & Emotionally Alluring Usually Do 5 Things In Everyday Life | Mitzi Bockmann

Published by Jenni Sidey

If you’re worried about how to be mentally & emotionally alluring to other people without losing and devaluing yourself, don’t panic. Perhaps you have a certain someone in mind, or perhaps you are just worried, in general, that someday you might meet someone and you won’t know what to do to attract them. Alluring women seem like they have it all. But what do they have that you don’t? What are they doing right? Learning how to be classy and alluring is something you can manage once you know the casual, everyday keys to attraction.  Mentally and emotionally alluring women casually do a few things in life: 1. They like themselves How can you expect someone to like you if you don’t like yourself? The key to being alluring and getting someone to fall for you is to make sure that you are happy with who you are in the world. You need to have done your work and be comfortable with yourself. People who are damaged and unhappy tend to attract people who are also damaged …

8 Things People With Emotionally Immature Parents Eventually Realize Weren’t Normal

8 Things People With Emotionally Immature Parents Eventually Realize Weren’t Normal

Published by Jenni Sidey

Emotionally immature parents might exhibit behaviors and responses that are self-centered, impulsive, controlling, and intrusive. If you were raised by emotionally immature parents, the path to self-discovery can be particularly challenging, and it’s important to take the time to heal once you make the realization.  Mental health therapists from I Go to Therapy took to Instagram to share some abnormal experiences (that may have seemed normal at the time) that may affect people in their adulthood if they grew up with emotionally immature parents. People who had emotionally immature parents eventually realize these things weren’t normal: 1. Feeling like they have to monitor everyone else’s emotions Krakenimages.com / Shutterstock If you are hypervigilant of the feelings of those around you, paying attention to any signs of anger or frustration, you may have grown up with emotionally immature parents. Your parents likely responded to you with high emotional reactivity and extreme emotional outbursts, or at the other end of the spectrum, with emotional unavailability. This environment of extremes results in a hyperfocus on others’ emotions as a …

Can Couples Be Too Emotionally Merged?

Can Couples Be Too Emotionally Merged?

Published by Jenni Sidey

Many couples today exist in a state of near-continuous contact—shared calendars, location sharing, constant texting, and overlapping friend groups. In many ways, this closeness is exactly what we want from a committed relationship. Emotional intimacy and responsiveness are genuine predictors of relationship health. Feeling understood and securely connected benefits both mental and physical well-being. But research is beginning to reveal a more complicated picture, one with direct implications for sexual desire. The conventional wisdom has long been that more closeness equals better relationships. And for many outcomes, that holds. On days when people feel closer to their partner, they also tend to report a higher level of desire. But closeness alone does not explain why so many couples who describe themselves as deeply connected also report fading sexual interest in each other. The Problem of Low “Otherness” Relationship researchers Amy Muise and Sophie Goss (2023) propose that what may be missing is something they call “otherness,” defined as the distinctiveness between partners that allows each person to continue seeing the other in a new light, …

The Invisible Type of Emotionally Neglectful Parent

The Invisible Type of Emotionally Neglectful Parent

Published by Jenni Sidey

The most common type of emotionally neglectful parents is also the most difficult kind to identify. They lurk in fine neighborhoods, fine jobs, and fine houses. They create fine families, and if you are friends with them, they appear to be absolutely fine. They may drive their children from one sports activity to another, stay on top of schedules, take family vacations, and help their kids with homework. They may even love their children and strive to do their best to raise them. Yet they make one crucial mistake that, even though it’s not their fault, leaves a lasting mark on their child. Many are mostly kind and welcoming when their adult child comes to visit. But despite all this, there are telltale signs. There are ways to know if your parents are of this ilk. We will get to that later. First, we must talk a little bit more about how emotionally neglectful parents are made, where they come from, and how they parent. The Well-Meaning-But-Neglected-Themselves (WMBNT) Parent The key to the most common …

How to Know If Your Parent Is Emotionally Unavailable

How to Know If Your Parent Is Emotionally Unavailable

Published by Jenni Sidey

An emotionally unavailable parent desires control, not closeness. They are “walled off” emotionally and cannot offer the important relational things that a parent who is emotionally available can, like empathy, active listening, and the willingness to consider your perspective for a moment to gain a deeper understanding of you. Because they lack these capabilities, and do not realize it, they tend to only feel “close” to you only when they have control. Without recognizing it, they condition you to do what they want, so they feel good in the relationship. Basically, if you think and feel like they do, they tend to feel secure in the relationship and close to you. If you disagree with them, they misinterpret this as rejection and withdraw from you or admonish you. It is both difficult and distressing because you are unable to be yourself around them if you wish to maintain their approval and love. Censoring how you feel and hiding aspects of your life results in you feeling shame that is unwarranted. After a while, this usually …