We’re wired to ask why — here’s what we’re really searching for
With frustration and fascination, I’ve come to begrudgingly accept that the questions I’m most interested in surface when I’m least equipped to answer them. Lights off, eyes closed, the pull of sleep growing stronger — a memory flashes across my mind. As I sink into it, the images turn into questions: Did I mess that up at work? What did they mean by that? Did I make the right decision? During my most recent late-night ruminations, I turned over the confusing behavior of someone I just met. We hit it off at first, and I was excited about the prospect of a new friend. Then, out of nowhere, they pulled away and stopped answering texts or reaching out to make plans — the all-too-familiar phenomenon of “ghosting.” I couldn’t help but wonder what happened, and I don’t mean that as a figure of speech. I literally could not help but wonder, my brain looping through the same events over and over again, more intent on solving this mystery than getting a good night’s sleep. Why …
