“You all know what they are, we’ve had a lot of fun with them.”
Sad Sack
In a new video, ex-president Donald Trump is a shell of his former boisterous self as he shills a new collection of his laughably ugly digital trading cards.
Posted on X-formerly-Twitter, Trump seems barely able to muster any enthusiasm when boasting that he has some “very exciting news” about the latest drop of his non-fungible token (NFT) trading cards.
“By popular demand, I am doing a new series of Trump digital trading cards,” the GOP candidate mutters in the strange video. “You all know what they are, we’ve had a lot of fun with them.”
In the video, Trump wheezes that if one buys 15 of the $99-apiece digital collectibles, they’ll receive a physical trading card in the mail that is said to contain a part of what he’s calling his “knock-out” suit that he wore when he was shot at a rally earlier this summer. They can also purchase packages that feature tickets to one of his galas, which sounds like a very expensive and creative form of torture, especially given how pale he looks in this video.
Crypto Clan
Since late 2022, Trump has — perhaps at the behest of his crypto-obsessed sons — been hawking his cartoonish NFT trading cards. Even after it was revealed that the art — if you can call it that — on them was likely plagiarized, the former president kept plugging drop after drop, and even got a hefty $7 million licensing fee for his trouble, per his most recent financial disclosures.
“You know, they call me the crypto-president,” Trump intones during the latest announcement. “I don’t know if that’s true or not, but a lot of people are saying that.”
Now on its fourth iteration, the latest Trump trading card drop — which per its website features so-called “art” of him dancing, wearing gold sneakers, and holding Bitcoin — will no doubt bring in some much-needed dinero for the candidate who’s been struggling as of late to pay his legal bills. It seems clear from his lackluster performance in this ad, however, that his struggles may not just be financial.
Indeed, although most folks on the site formerly known as Twitter made fun of the ex-president and his ugly-as-sin NFTs, it wasn’t lost on us at Futurism how defeated Trump sounded in the video that bears an uncanny resemblance to the one he posted on the site nearly four years ago when he got pre-vaccine COVID-19.
He might not be going out like Stan Chera, but if this extremely sad video is any indication, he may yet go out with a whimper as opposed to a bang.
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